Relationships and Marriage | The Arising Voice

Take a moment and remember your commitment

Let?s talk about relationships. The subject of relationships is probably one that we all can say we know a little something about ? amen? Some have had good luck with their relationships, while others perhaps have had slightly less luck with theirs. No one can prepare us for what it takes to have and to hold a real relationship. Learning to be with someone, understanding their differences and finding a middle ground on which both individuals can live together can be adventurous for both the man and woman. As Christians though, we should attempt to look at the examples God has given us in His word so that we can better understand? how we can achieve a happy and strong relationship or marriage.

Love, what is love? How do you define the word? This is a question I think I can truly say will fill the minds of every individual at one time or another. We all want it; we all need it, despite what many out there wish to claim. The examples we were shown by our parents, family and even friends have helped mold each of our understanding of the word love. The problem however; is what happens when those examples were not so positive? But rather, they were more destructive then they were constructive? Can we somehow relearn the meaning of love and then finally grasp the real knowledge of how to be a good? husband or a good wife all over again. I think we can. To do this however, we must be willing to empty our minds of past opinions and mistakes and begin to listen to the wisdom of scripture and to the desires of the one we say we love.

Human emotions are like the leaves blowing in the wind. They blow carefree and flow with whatever direction the wind might carry them. Emotions are subject to our environment and how that environment make us feel at any particular time, is what we experience. One day it may create a feeling of happiness within us, while the very next day, our environment may just do the opposite to us, and make us feel sorrow or pain.

Love however should not be subject to such environmental changes. Real love is solid. It does not come and go like so many like to claim. I hear statements such as ?I just don?t feel I love them anymore?, or my favorite, ?I love them, I?m just not IN love with them anymore?. Love, according to God in 1 Corinthians 13 ( NIV ) Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ?Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

I believe I can say that one real issue people have with their relationships, or more directly marriage. Is a failure to understand and acknowledge that they made a promise to not only each other, but also to God himself as well. They made a promise to stand by each other, despite the environmental conditions around them that may have them spinning in circles at times. We take a promise to love each other and care for each other through both hard times and bad times. So many say the words, but how many begin looking for loopholes around their promise as soon as their environment begins to make them feel uncomfortable or not so happy at the time. If you base your relationship on just how you ?feel? at just one particular time, without measuring the effects that your surroundings create, then you do your relationship injustice. Things around us may cause unhappiness, depression and even torment, but real love can conquer any environment as long as we don?t give into it. Note: If however the environment can be identified as destructive to our relationship, I believe we are obligated to either seek a new environment or positively seek remedies to help the current one.

How many relationships have been destroyed by things such as financial distress, bad habits or just a simple refusal to offer an ear and listen to each other? How many couples take the time to share their feelings, or have you been taught that it?s just not cool or masculine to talk?

Has the environment of peer pressure silenced your voice? Has the environment of your social groups put a wedge between you? Has your job become your first love and your commitment before your spouse? Perhaps it?s not that your love has changed, but simply that you have placed so many new things in your path that you can?t see what lead you together to begin with anymore? The bulk of new toys have blocked your view and taken your eyes off what was said to be you?re everything. Can you remember when you first said ?I do? How you wanted to gain nice things for each other? Ask yourself right now, if perhaps the race to achieve those nice things has placed the huge barrier between you. Do you wish to regain the love that you had? Maybe all you need to do is to get all the junk out of your way first?

Having relationships and a marriage that are healthy and alive needs two things. Since such things originate from God, we need his wisdom and spiritual intervention in our lives to help us conquer the mighty forces that will in time come against almost every relationship. Second, they need two people that wont base their love on whatever direction the wind may carry their emotions, but have dedicated their lives to the pursuit of honoring their promise of love and commitment to each other. Take a moment today; push everything in front of you or between you out of your way. The world is only the two of you, if but for only a moment in time.

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Source: http://arisingvoice.com/2011/08/21/relationships-and-marriage/

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